What Questions Do You Ask Yourself?
Quality questions create a quality life and career
When I first started coach training several years ago, one key insight had a profound impact on me: Coaches don’t need to have the answers; they ask the right questions.
This was such a revelation for me because I thought that coaches “fixed” things and provided answers to their clients. But the best coaches don’t do that because instead of giving the proverbial fish, we help the client learn to fish.
In other words, instead of telling clients what insights we think they should have, we ask the right questions so they have their own insights and can draw from their intuition and creativity.
This reminds me of another powerful quote that resonated with me: “The quality of your life is a direct reflection of the quality of the questions you are asking yourself.” Coaches ask high-quality questions so clients have the high-quality outcomes they desire. But you don’t have to be a professional coach to receive the benefits of asking thought-provoking, empowering questions.
World-renowned coach and speaker Tony Robbins once shared this insight: “Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions and, as a result, they get better results.”
So, the question is: What kind of questions do you ask yourself?
If you’re asking yourself the following low-quality questions, you’re going to produce low-quality outcomes for yourself:
What’s wrong with me?
Why can’t I get this right?
Why do they have success and I don’t?
Why can’t this team member get their act together?
How do I get rich?
If you’re stuck in the trap of low-quality questions that disempower you or cause you to be in constant judgement of yourself and others, it’s time to shift to higher-quality, higher-consciousness questions that will actually empower your personal growth. Let’s reframe the questions above so they are higher quality:
How can I improve so I reach my goals?
What can I learn from this experience where I didn’t get the result I desired?
How do I define success for myself? What can I learn from other’s success while staying true to my own definition of success?
How can I improve as a leader so my team members reach their potential?
How do I create more abundance; not just monetary, but in all aspects of my life?
The energy of these higher-quality, more conscious questions is totally different from the low-quality questions. Instead of coming from an attitude of judgement, resentment, anger, or victimhood, they provoke curiosity, reflection, and a mastery versus performance mentality. The kinds of questions you ask yourself are a direct reflection of your current level of consciousness and how you view and engage the world around you.
This week, take note of the internal dialogue you experience. What kinds of questions are you asking yourself? Your feelings are the best barometer of the quality of your questions.
Do you feel sad, angry, or resentful when you ask yourself questions? If so, they are low-quality, low-consciousness questions. If you feel hopeful, optimistic, and creative, then your questions are higher-quality and higher-consciousness, which will draw out your innate intuition and creativity.
You can also elevate the quality of your team interactions by noting the kinds of questions your team asks each other. In your next team meeting, notice whether the questions asked empower the team, or drag down its energy and enthusiasm. How can you encourage your team to ask higher-quality, higher-consciousness questions?
Change the questions you ask yourself; change the quality of your life and career.
Work happy. Live happy. BE happy.
Meredith
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The way we work and build teams is rapidly changing. Leaders often feel unprepared to navigate the transition. As a conscious leadership coach, consultant and communicator, Meredith helps leaders and their teams create new ways of working and relating so they can prepare for the future by consciously co-creating it.
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