Are you available?
Addressing the compulsion to be constantly on call
One time I was in coaching session with a prospective client who was considering a job change. They described to me how desperately unhappy they were with the stress of their current job. This was made obvious by the fact every few minutes, they would pause distractedly, then apologize saying their boss was messaging/texting them and they had to respond.
When I asked how many hours a day this happened, they shared that it was constant. They were expected to be available at pretty much all hours of the day and night. They didn’t feel they could put a 30-minute block on their calendar for our coaching session. They had no work/life balance and were already in full-blown burnout. No wonder they were ready to find a new job.
This is obviously an extreme example of being too available. (It’s also a horrifying example of terrible management.) But I’ve noticed many professionals feel like they have to be constantly available to their team—even at all hours of the night.
In a recent article for The Atlantic, Joe Pinsker shared how he has handled this modern challenge of being constantly available for everyone thanks to our electronic devices. He contends that “today’s norms of responsiveness are ridiculous.” And “We shouldn’t apologize for failing to meet them.”
Pinsker finally decided not to apologize for how he structures his schedule and response time. He took back control over his time and peace of mind. But he had to get over the feeling that he was letting others down or was beholden to their time demands.
There are two issues to address when it comes to the availability issue: 1) the mindset of “needing” to be constantly available and 2) improving how a team communicates and operates.
First, if you’re one of those people who feels like they need to be constantly available, ask yourself why.
Is it because you want to feel needed?
Is it because you feel responsible for everything—even things beyond your role?
Is it because you’re afraid your manager or colleagues will think less of you if you aren’t constantly available?
Is it because you feel powerless to speak up about unhealthy cultural norms in your workplace?
These are all assumptions or limiting beliefs about your potential and what is actually needed to achieve success. Working with a coach is a powerful way to address these self-defeating beliefs. In order to actually be a more effective, conscious leader, it’s critical to address these types of limiting patterns.
Second, let’s address team communication and structure. How does your team and internal culture deal with communication and timeliness? Asynchronous communication and scheduled synchronous office hours are a fantastic way to increase your team’s productivity while alleviating the stress of being constantly available.
Another important structure is setting clear goals with realistic deadlines. Note that I wrote realistic deadlines. That doesn’t mean assigning tasks or work that will require staff to work unreasonable hours. Unless you work in an emergency industry or have the country’s nuclear codes, your staff shouldn’t be stressing at all hours of the night and day.
In order to create a more conscious workplace, we need more conscious leaders willing to buck the trend of constant availability that is stressing too many professionals. It means working on your own patterns from which others take cues, and instituting systems that truly care for your team’s mental and physical health. We don’t need to be constantly available to be truly effective and successful.
Work happy. Live happy. BE happy.
Meredith
The way we work and build teams is rapidly changing. Leaders often feel unprepared to navigate the transition. As a conscious leadership coach, consultant and communicator, Meredith helps leaders and their teams create new ways of working and relating so they can prepare for the future by consciously co-creating it.
Contact her to develop your conscious leadership and transform your organization into the workplace of the future.
You can support my work developing more conscious leadership in the world by investing in a paid subscription to this newsletter. Upgrade your subscription today!
Connect with Meredith on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn for content related to these topics.